Saturday 12 June 2010

Nigerian movies and part 2...







"ANOTHER BLOCKBUSTER FROM OSSY AFFASON PRODUCTIONS, ITS THRILLING, ACTION PACKED, SUSPENSE FILLEN INSTEAD OF SUSPENSE FILLED, SPELL BOUNDING(TRYNA REMEMBER ALL THE GRAMMAR THEY USE TO ADVERTISE A LOUSY MOVIE) AND THE TITE OF THE MOVIE COMES OUT AND ON THE POSTER HAVING A PICTURE OF RAMSEY NOUAH WITH HIS MOUTH OPEN AND WITHOUT EVEN LOOKING AT THE NAME OF THE MOVIE ITS TITLED WHISPER ABI NA SCREAM SEF,,,,Chei the names that producers give movies these days is really spell bounding..how as in how on earth can u name a movie:

2FACE OR

BEYONCE AND RIHANA OR

CINDERALLA STORY AND THE NIGERIAN VERSION...COME ON PRODUCER, DIRECTORS HOW CAN U BE SO CRUEL EVEN THE ACTORS(HOW UNA GO LET THEM PUT YOUR FACE FOR THAT KIN MOVIE WITH NAME THE NEXT THING U WUD HEAR IS BEANS AND GARRI(LWKMD)...

Sometimes there are a very very few movies that make sense and the producer wOuld want to keep the audience in suspense take for example..... WELL dont even have anyone thaT have made sense like that... the correct ones that i have watched had just disk a and b like KEEPING FAITH, RELOADED,MADAM DEAREST(OK TIS WAS UP TO A PART 2 AND IT MADE SENSE A WHOLE LOT OF SENSE NOT SOME amateur JUMPING IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA SCREAMING LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION... ONE OTHER THING I CANT STAND IS WHEN YOU SEE THE LIGHTING OR SOUND BOOM IN THE MOVIE YOU ARE WATCHING AS IN EDITOR WTH ARE U BEING PAID FOR, TO JUST BE SHOUTING CUT, ROLLING AND 1 2 3...AAARGGHHH NOT SAYING AM THE BEST EDITOR, DIRECTOR OR PRODUCER BUT I TRY ABEG...
NOW TO COSTUMES, ITS EITHER THE COSTUMIER DOES NOT LIKE THE ACTOR/ACTRESS OR HE/SHE WASN'T GIVEN ENOUGH MONEY AND EVEN IF U WERE NOT GIVEN ENOUGH MONEY I BELIEVE IN LIFE'S Philosophy OF DOING THINGS AND DOING IT WELL YoU NEVER KNOW WHERE YOUR BIG BREAK WOULD COME FROM(WAS WATCHn A MOVIE WITH TONTO DIKE ,JACKIE APPIAH,VAN VICKER AND OLU JACOBS IN IT AND MEHN THEY DIDNT DO THOSE ACTRESSes WELL, WTF GIVES U A BLUE TOP SHINNING BLUE AND THEN ORANGE 3/4 ND TO CAP IT ALL UP ANORANGE CAR?????????????????????? AS IN LWKMD THAT Day IT WASNT FUNNY TO THE EXTENT MY MAID SAID "WETIN BE THIS,WHY THIS AUNTY DEY DO LIKE THIS" CHEI NAIJA NAIJA, LETS WAVE OUR FLAG AND KEEP IT FLYING IN THE INDUSTRY... GET A GOOD COSTUMIER, SOUND AND LIGHT GUYS A Wonderful Editor AND MOST DEF A SENSIBLE DIRECTOR TO SAVE YOUR VIEWERS THE HEARTACHE AND THE WORLD AT LARGE.
Isit meor i think its who yu are as a person that determines the roles they give you lets take for instance
1.Muma Gee aka Patience Ozokwor am not saying shes wicked or shes a witch but why is it wicked wicked mother, sister, wife, aunts or any other feminine role she always doing...hmmm

2.Uncle Pete Edochie" the grass that does not like to drink water will die in the end and be buried before his time that's how u know our dear father, grand father and great grand father a scene must not pass without igwe giving a proverb or 2 minimum(that scene never complete and he too he is always playing wicked roles(hiann..igbo accent)

3.Our very ****** own mercy Johnson cant but let it all out or steal somebody's man or be a seductress..... Why??????

4.When you see Chioma Chukukwa in a movie you know who your good two shoes or angel Mary is

5 nd 6.When you see Uncle Mike Ezuronye and his cohort Emeka Ike, you have seen your American wonder boys wannabe/ razzites

7.When u see uche jombo(my sturvsilolo)u have seen crarse girl

8,9,10.When u see Genevieve, Omotola,Rita Dominic u have seen ur classy yet bitchy idols

11.When u see Jenifa u know u gats to belong....
Who are we missing here
Chei how can i forget i just have to put him when u see majid you have seen mr LOVER BOY who has kissed almost everybody and who dey always chop beating

12.With aunty stella Damasus dem born am for inside water, cry no dey tey commot from her eye..kini
Watch out for part 2...In stores soon... Wait for it, buy it, watch it, tell ur friends about it and keep watching it don't stop...hahahaha..lwkmd

1 comment:

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